The Year in Over/Under 2016

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He was cool.

He a drug addict though.

He always wanna drink syrup.

He always talking about, I got a rumbling in my tummy.

He just always.

You heard, he's a drug addict, he a drunk.

And that nigga Eeyore,

he's always losing his fucking tail, you heard me.

Nobody loves me.

I always wanted a nigga to kiss his ass,

and pick him up, and shit.

And I don't know what the fuck wrong with Christopher?

You hear me.

What's Shirley Temple?

Is she the one with the psychic powers?

She's sings the song.

Animal crackers in my soup

Is that Shirley Temple?

Animal crackers

No, no.

Animal crackers, loop de loop.

No, Shirley Temple's the ice cream.

It's a ice cream.

No, Shirley temple-

animal crackers in my soup!

Is that really Shirley temple?

Yeah!

Damn, aye that's fire.

Oh my god, my dog ate my tampon.

My dog totally ate tampons of mine.

And I was on the street,

and she started shitting it out, and it wasn't coming out.

So, I had to take the string,

and pull the string out of my dogs ass.

With like, my blood and her shit on it.

And I was like, this is so freaky.

Something I put into my body,

I'm now watching coming out of my dogs ass.

Like, if you think about it.

It really can like,

or if you're a little stoned and you think about it.

Like, you'll just be like.

Whoa, it's the cycle of life.

You've ever been on a Jet Ski?

I've never been on a jet ski.

We were talking about camels, you've been on mad camels.

Yeah, I've been on a lot of camels.

Because, I feel like they put a lot of brown skinned actors

in films where they have to,

raise camels and ride camels.

But, not so much on jet skis.

Water camels.

What do they call, manatees?

Water camels?

Water, something.

Water cows, oh.

Yeah I've seen a manatee.

Yeah, manatees are mad.

They look so outdated.

They look like, yo why aren't you extinct?

Outdated for an animal.

Yeah, they've made no attempt to like optimize

their evolution in any way.

It's like a hunk of flesh that floats.

I think you're being really hard on manatees.

They're not streamline.

They have it hard enough.

Manatees are underrated.

Jet skis, who the fuck cares?

Eating pussy is super underrated.

I think is crazy when dudes are like,

Oh, I don't do that.

That's a whole, that's wild man.

That's a great experience for everyone involved.

You can even get intimate with it, and hold hands during it.

So, it's like, I'm not just eating your pussy.

I'm like.

We're here together, to share this moment.

Sammy Hagar!

I'm Sammy Hagar!

He should put on a song that goes,

Drink my tequila!

Fuck you David Lee Roth.

Woo!

C'mon!

Suck my little ass penis hole.

And drink tequila from the tip of my nipples.

Yeah!

Baby, baby!

Cabo wa-bo.

Yeah!

Then, I would listen to him.

Definitely, overrated.

You know like, you don't want to see like, I mean.

I mean, I guess if you're having sex or whatever.

Like, you don't want to see Tupac looking at you.

If somebody would like, just like have sex.

And you know, didn't look at themself in the mirror,

and just see like Tupac looking like this.

Like,

or like, you know.

Like no, no.

No way, not for me.

Devil worship?

I love Barbie, she's underrated.

People give Barbie so much shit.

You know how many careers Barbie has had?

No one else has done that,

her achievements are astronomical.

Will Smith as a rapper, underrated.

It's okay to not cuss.

I don't cuss in my songs,

bitch.

Scar tissue that I wish you saw.

Sarcastic mister know it all.

Close your eyes and I'll kiss you 'cause,

with the birds I'll share.

With the birds I'll share this lonely view.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You can't say that's a great song without saying that,

I took her out, it was a Friday night.

I wore cologne, to get the feeling right.

We started making out, and she took off my pants.

And then, I turned on the TV.

And that's about the time she walked away from me.

Nobody likes you, when you're 23.

And you're still acting like it's freshman year,

but what the fuck is ADD.

My friends say I should act my age.

You know, you can't say.

Shit, Red Hot Chili Peppers without saying Blink-182.

And you can't say Blink-182 without saying,

another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.

Time grabs you by the wrist, and directs you where to-

you can't say that without saying Green Day.

And then you can't say that,

without saying Panic! At The Disco.

Well I chimed in with a,

haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?

You can't say those, without saying them.

You gotta say Plain White T's.

You gotta say it!

We can talk all day, I'm a just cut it short.

But, you can't just say one without the other.

Then you got Creed with his fucking chin,

and his fucking nose.

But, that motherfucker gonna touch your heart.

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