Das Racist - Over / Under

(fast drumming)

(drum rolling)

Fuck Glee. I'm a go on the record on this one.

[Man] Oh shit.

Glee is wack.

Fuck the kids and fuck the teenagers

who work on the show too.

I hope your lives end up miserably after this...

Yeah, fuck those little kids.

Brief highlight.

I hope they never get work after this bullshit.

Jerk-ass.

(drum rolling)

Paula Poundstone's underrated.

She's a sexy lady.

Yo, she touched... were they men or girls or boys?

Cause she had a pedophilia case where

she touched them sticks or pussies?

She touched my heart, is what Paula Poundstone did.

Okay.

Why don't you write back to me, Paula?

(drum rolling)

Oh! Underrated!

I don't even do it.

Vastly underrated.

I barely ever wash my hands.

Every time I do it, I'm like,

Why don't I do this more?

Yeah!

Do you run the faucet and pretend to wash your hands?

I do that almost every time.

What? That's crazy man. What?

When I urinate.

Like, just so you don't feel embarrassed

that you didn't wash your hands?

No if people are around, if people can hear it.

If I defecate.

[Man With Hat] What, that's insane.

if I release feces I'll clean my hands.

Even if I grab my dick, unless I grab it too much,

if I'm pissing I never wash my hands.

I run the faucet.

How much is too much, man?

I just put a little water on it and rub it up

If I'm really like, if I'm itchy.

You wanna, like, scratch it.

Like pulling apart the skin of the scrotum

to get that itch going, or like,

lifting it up and scratching it.

Real good.

[Man With Dark Glasses] Yeah, that's great,

then I'll clean my hands.

If I'm just like, kinda grabbing the tip of the peen

and releasing urine, I'll probably run the faucet.

So washing hands is underrated.

Vastly underrated.

It would lead to a lot less abuse of antibiotics

which create the hyper-resistant shit.

Yeah, AIDS was started cause of antibiotics so, yeah.

(drum rolling)

(All expressing disgust)

Overrated. Overrated.

Like, modified soy products like texturized soy protein

used to make feed milk products and a lot of soy milk,

unless it's whole soy bean. (laughing)

tends to cause a lot of hormonal estrogen problems,

that's why all these stupid vegetarians

who don't know how to eat vegetables.

Got big titties.

They got big, beautiful breasts

and I'm attracted to them, man or woman.

I will go on record on this one, fuck soy bean.

Nah, soy beans are sick.

I like soy bean If you East Asian.

White people, lay off the soy bean or I'll smack ya.

SOYJOY, I'll shove it up your ass till your dead.

(drum rolling)

Sofia Coppola?

Overrated. Vastly overrated.

Very bad woman.

Don't much care for her as a bad.

Cool with me. I love looking.

I always Google Image search her though,

like once a week, I swear to you guys.

I do like looking at pictures of her face.

Something about it is so fucking captivating.

My Google Image search game,

I start with Julien Assange, then I go to...

Who were we just talkin' about?

Oh, live shots of Natalie Portman's shaved head.

Fat man scoop naked. (clicks tongue)

Yeah, I type in like, maybe Mim's nudes.

(laughing)

Something like that I might type in.

Maybe CeeLo, CeeLo nudes.

Semi-Nude. Semi-nudes!

He has some racy butt shots. (laughs)

(fast drumming)