Beth Ditto Rates Olive Garden, Vaping, and Rap Rock

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I think it's underrated.

I used to use Tom's Natural.

But then I realized you just smell like apricot

for a little bit

and then you smell like onions and apricot.

You smell like chutney.

Good news and bad news.

Tastes delicious, smells

like your armpits.

Leggings as pants is a pet peeve for me.

But I say that as someone

who's not even wearing pants right now.

You know what I think it is?

It depends on the thickness.

It's like, who cares?

Who gives a shit what you wear,

but personally, if I can see the color

of your panties,

unless it was intentional,

for me, for instance, I'd probably don't give two shits.

I don't care.

Like, I don't care,

but if my mother was doing that

and she didn't know,

heartbreaking.

I think you should always let it rip.

Just breathe.

♪ Just breathe ♪

Oh, I don't care.

But I think it's funny

that her name's Alexa.

They should name one like Brianna

or Brittney would be a great one.

Britt, maybe what it does,

like a person, it gets comfortable with you.

Yeah, there's only a few people that call me Britt.

And she says that to you, too.

Alexa hates you.

I think you should know that.

Alexa fuckin' hates you.

But you know who loves you?

Brittney.

Rap rock?

(laughs)

Well, like Run-DMC and Aerosmith,

that was amazing.

But I think, I don't know,

rap rock is not my favorite.

There aren't that many things

that I'll say are bad or good.

I'll say that Korn is bad.

I will say that.

They're kind of like, remember

that record was so homophobic?

I just remember being like, Fuck you.

Your name is Korn with a backwards K.

And why are rap rockers also,

it always seems like they're always

just a little bit homophobic or racist.

They're like, I hate rap, but this is good.

This is badass.

You know?

(laughs)

I'm going to hell, I'm going to hell.

♪ Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy ♪

Nice try.

Seriously, that is Blue Moon

that they just--

it's so crazy.

I think I'm just mostly mad at Kid Rock and Korn.

Both start with a K.

Kid Rock should change the K to a backwards K.

He looks like Lynyrd Skynyrd

if Lynyrd Skynyrd was a person.

Like, he looks like his name would be Lynyrd, Lynyrd.

Hey, is that Kid or is that Lynyrd?

Kid Lynyrd?

(laughs)

I love Olive Garden.

That salad dressing is amazing.

(kisses)

It's so good.

I'm not going there for a five-star Italian experience.

I'm going there for an Olive Garden experience.

I know what I'm getting when I go, so--

and this is another trick,

Olive Garden trick, if you'd like to know is

when you take the breadsticks

and you put 'em away

and you hide them so they bring you more

so that you just go home with like this many,

like a kindling,

a tinder, you know, you could start a fire.

You know what I mean?

Like when you go get kindling for your

fireplace, set a fire in your belly.

It kinda does set a fire in your belly, actually.

'Cause you never feel amazing when you leave there.

You never feel good.

You go in there so excited

and then you leave like, Ugh.

I vape.

Are you ready for this?

I don't like weed.

It makes me pee my pants, literally.

I can't smoke weed.

But I do vape nicotine.

But my friend calls it a douche flute,

which I think is really fucking funny.

♪ It's my little douche flute, you don't know what I got. ♪

I think they should really make it a flute, though.

Like, if it made sounds.

(imitating a flute)

Don't tell mama, but I vaped on the bus.

Can you imagine getting a bus driver vaping on the bus?

That's the future.

That's the world we live in.

That's Trump's America.

You know what, that's Trump's America.

Getting caught vaping in the girls' room.

Oh, she's so underrated all the time.

I really do think she's an underrated role model

for queer culture and fat people and women,

I really do.

And body acceptance.

She was ahead of her time, body positivity.

She really was.

I remember being a little girl

and just pretending that I was her for hours.

You know, that was my nickname

and it never bothered me.

It's like, you know, if someone called you a pig,

usually you'd be like, Fuck you!

Or cry in your room alone.

But when people call me Miss Piggy,

I was always like, Yes!

I'd be like, Moi?

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